It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. I Corinthians 13:5
When you haven’t forgiven those who’ve hurt you, you turn back against your future. When you do forgive, you start walking forward.— Tyler Perry
The life-giver above all else always forgives. Sometimes this is the hardest pill to swallow, forgiveness. The enemy would like us to savor the negative energy that we hang on to when people do wrong to us. He wants us to seek revenge or hope for terrible things to happen to that person. He plants the though in our head that to forgive is to accept what was done to you, that is the biggest lie there is. The truth is to forgive is to let go of the power that the person has over you. It doesn’t mean you are okay with what they may have done, no, it means you release yourself from the hurt and anger that was caused by them. An unforgiving spirit is one that is tied to the anchor to the past. You cannot move forward if you can’t forgive someone. Tyler Perry is a great example of a forgiving person. He was molested time and again when he was a child and had to come to grips with his past. He finally was able to step into forgiveness and get on the Oprah show and share his pain. He with 250 other men that were molested when they were children. There are steps to forgiveness we need to take to get to that zone.
The first step we have to take is to acknowledge that we need to forgive. Is there someone in your past that you may have not forgiven, you need to forgive him or her. Sometimes it may be so long ago that you have forgotten that you need to forgive them, then prayer comes into play. God does not want us to have an unforgiving heart. He wants us to forgive as He forgave us. If we can’t forgive like Him, He cannot have anything to do with us.
If that person is still in your life, the next step is to go to them and tell them you forgive them. Sometimes that is not possible with different situations and time. Prayer comes in handy here as well by telling God you forgive them. Just remember that this is a process, just by saying you forgive them doesn’t mean you forgave them in your heart. It comes with time since time and years have happened since then. Another point is that you don’t have to continue the relationship either. This would happen if it was a friendship at one time. A marriage is a different matter entirely. I think that since God brought you together, you should work as hard as possible to repair it. Open communication is the key here whether with God or people.
The last step to forgiveness is to acknowledge that you have forgiven and walk in freedom. This last step I cannot tell you how you will know, but you will know. The person that hurt me long ago God showed me that they may have experienced the same thing and were passing that negative thing on. So, I had some compassion for them and then I was able to let go of my hurt and forgive them. You see it all has to do with the situation and the circumstances of what you have undergone. That’s why I cannot tell you exactly, but with your situation you will know.
The first step is to acknowledge that you have to forgive someone. The second step is to forgive them in person or through prayer. The last step is to acknowledge the forgiveness and walk in freedom. What keeps us from being life-givers is a bitter unforgiving heart. Don’t be bitter, be better.
© [David Howard], [David’s Body Temple], 2011-2015.